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Episode 7

The Worst Quotation Ever Received...

Why is Nige sitting on the floor in this week's episode?

And what has caused him so much despair?

Don't quote me (!) - but you'll defo want to listen to this week's Business Growth Central...

Episode 7:
The Worst Quotation Ever Received...
00:00 / 00:00

Episode Transcript:

Nigel Botterill:
Hi, welcome to Business Growth Central where this week I'm sat on the floor. The reason I'm sat on the floor is because I've got a very important lesson that will apply to you because I promise you, it almost certainly will apply to you if you have to provide some quotations to get business. This episode was triggered by a decision that Mrs. Botterill and I took to have our on-suite bathroom re-floored. We went to a local flooring company in Solihull and they impressed us with their tremendously extensive displays in the showroom of all the different Amtico flooring surfaces. After much deliberation by Mrs. B., a decision was made and she chose the floor that she would like.

Very Helpful Man:
Excellent.

Nigel Botterill:
Said the very helpful man.

Very Helpful Man:
I will price that up for you and send you a quote in the post.

Nigel Botterill:
We will not be ordering from this particular flooring company in Solihull because of their quotes. I need to use what they are doing as an example, as a warning, as a red flag, to make sure that none of my EC members make the same mistakes that these guys are making because rather than their quotation attracting me to them, rather than their quotation compelling me to get out my chequebook, or phone them with a credit card number. Please come and put this floor into my bathroom, the exact opposite has occurred.
Now just to be clear, I'm a very, very practical, pragmatic guy. I do recognise that especially when you are going into someone's home to fit a new floor, there are going to be certain caveats and things that need taken out and looking at undoing, but you do not want to be using quotations like this one if you want to get business because I have not been turned away by the price. To be clear, I didn't really care about the price. It was a perfectly acceptable price. The price has got absolutely nothing to do with our decision, but the wording that they've used on the quotation, well, that has everything to do with our decision.
Queue, quotation. What you need to know [inaudible 00:02:31] is our bath in our on-suites. We got a bath in there and the bath sits about eight inches away from the wall so I assume Mr. Flooring Company in Solihull, he'll be able to fit the Amptico up to the wall behind the bath.

Mr. Flooring Company:
No.

Nigel Botterill:
Now, one of the reasons we want the floor redoing is there's a little bump in the floor. It's a long story, but obviously being a flooring company in Solihull, you'll be able to level that out for us?

Mr. Flooring Company:
Oh, no.

Nigel Botterill:
I had some new carpets fitted last year. I remember when the carpet fitters had finished, all the doors were sticking on the new carpets. That will happen then you'll sort that out where you fix the door so that the doors open nicely on the new floor.

Mr. Flooring Company:
No, I can't do that.

Nigel Botterill:
Just to be clear, there's not much furniture. Obviously, it's an on-suite bathroom, but that little dresser in the corner, you'll be able to move out into the bedroom?

Mr. Flooring Company:
Oh, we're not allowed.

Nigel Botterill:
Now, Sue took a long time deciding on the precise flooring that she wants to have in this bathroom. The flooring that comes will match the sample that you've given us, won't it?

Mr. Flooring Company:
Sorry, mate, no.

Nigel Botterill:
Removing the old floor, that's not going to be a problem? You'll take care of all that, won't you?

Mr. Flooring Company:
No, I can't do that.

Nigel Botterill:
Now, a little bit cheeky this, but I'd really appreciate it. Just when you get out of the bath, there's a little squeaky floorboard. Could you just put a screw in that while you've got it all exposed?

Mr. Flooring Company:
No.

Nigel Botterill:
Then there's this phrase here. This is a lovely one. It is the customer's responsibility to notify the fitter in writing of the location of any pipes or cables which might be damaged during the fitting. How the ... am I supposed to know where me pipes are? You're the ... plumber. It then says no responsibility can be accepted for damage caused by pipes or cables unless written notification has been received by us ahead of installation. ... off. There's another belter here. I'm looking at having an Amtico floor fitted. Please note that Amtico stipulate that you can only use their own cleaners on their floor products. Failure to do so will avoid any guarantee. I don't know what we're dealing with here.
Anyway, but I do want to go ahead. Obviously, it's important to make sure someone's here when you come so we can get specific on the timing and arrive, can we?

Mr. Flooring Company:
No.

Nigel Botterill:
That's it. It was actually a single sheet of paper. A single sheet, no letter. Single sheet on the front price and all those [inaudible 00:04:56] on the back. That quotation has lost them my business because the impression it gives me is of a company that really they're in business just to obviously humour themselves and look after themselves. There's not any sense of realisation of what they are dealing with here in terms of going into customers' homes and what people want. There's no attempt in that quotation to remind me of how lovely my new floor will be and what a difference it will make. There's nothing in that quotation that fills you with confidence from all their previous customers and all the many thousands of homes that they've worked with or other people. There's no attempt to resell or confirm the decisions that we made in the euphoria of the moment in their shop.
The reason why I'm going to find another flooring company to come and fit an Amtico floor in my on-suite bathroom is because of all those ass-protecting negative, oozing, horrible, we don't give a shit about our customers quotes that are on their quotation. I just want you to be mindful because we all get so close to the things that we deal with and deal with every day and I want you to be mindful of what your quotation really looks like when it's viewed in isolation by a new customer who doesn't know all the things that you know. I don't think for a minute there'll be an EC member with a quote as bad as that one but I do think that there'll be EC members with opportunities to make their quotes better for little effort and just a little bit of thought, but it will improve your conversions. At times like these, we all need every help we can get to improve our conversions.
That's why this week's Business Growth Central is all about the worst quotation that Nigel's ever received. I hope that's helpful. Can I get off the floor now? It's ever so uncomfortable down here.

Matt:
Today's takeaway, it's not about the price of your clothes. It's how it's presented. Don't puke all over your offer with a load of bullshit terms of conditions. Think about your customer, make them feel special.

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